Tuesday marks the end of an era for the Federal Reserve. Chairman Alan Greenspan is stepping down after nearly 20 years with the Fed. Sure, we know he presided over a period of low interest rates and was nominated by Democrat and Republican presidents alike, but who is Alan Greenspan?
Alan Greenspan was […]

Charlene Richards, the 82-year-old former nurse of Aaron Spelling, claims that Spelling made sexual advances toward her. She’s suing Spelling and seeking at least $25,000 in damages for sexual harassment, discrimination, battery, and wrongful termination.
Hey Charlene, let’s have a reality check and drop the lawsuit. Aaron Spelling probably has a long list of […]

Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi has pledged abstinence until the next general election. He made this comment after being blessed by a preacher on TV:
“Thank you dear Father Massimiliano, I’ll try not to let you down and I promise you two and a half months of complete sexual abstinence until April 9.”
I’m pretty sure […]

Like Colin Farrell’s recently released sextape, Kevin Federline’s hot new single PopoZão has been taking the nation by shitstorm. If you didn’t catch James Lipton from Inside the Actor’s Studio reading the lyrics to PopoZão, its classic. For those of you cats in the know, a video of K-Fed orgasming to the sound […]

In some defective copies of the book, “Potty Time with Elmo,” a character asks the reader, “Uh oh, who wants to die?” The book is a read-along with push button audio, and the corresponding text says, “Uh oh, who has to go?”
The liar publisher, Publications International, claims that the sound was recorded correctly, but […]

To All the Friends of Team Smackage,
Tomorrow morning, I leave for sunny beautiful awesome historical warm fun-filled Kansas City. I’ll be there Monday through Friday, but don’t fret! Look how much I love you, our beloved readers; I wrote a whole bunch of smack for this week in a special, time-released formula. […]

Unfortunately team smackage and the smackage goat had a late night last night full of wanton hookers, booze and many Nike tube socks. We will be taking a day off to recuperate from the night’s activities and will return in full force Monday.
As Heidi Klum on Project Runway says.. Auf Wiedersehen, bitches!

During a Q&A session at Kansas State University, alumnus Jeremy Parker asked President Bush if he’d seen Brokeback Mountain yet. Bush laughed uncomfortably and offered to discuss ranching with Parker.
Jeremy Parker, you’re my hero! We all know that Bush doesn’t really know what he’s talking about on the foreign policy questions that […]

Scientists at the Smithsonian National Zoo’s Conservation and Research Center have been struggling to get rare clouded leopards to breed. The problem wasn’t fertility; it was just that the male leopards were complete assholes:
“The males killed the females, sometimes almost instantly. Even if they could tolerate one another in a cage, they refused to […]

As most of you probably don’t know, I headed to Park City, Utah this past weekend to attend the Sundance Film Festival. Thats me and my girl Jessica to the right. Well, more like Cinderella and her camera crazy step-sister. Here are a few things that I learned while at Sundance:

1) Fiji […]