David Letterman has psychic powers
Claiming that David Letterman has caused her sleep deprivation and mental cruelty through secret code words and gestures on his late night show, a Sante Fe woman recently filed a temporary restraining order against him:
“She wrote that she began sending Letterman “thoughts of love” after his “Late Show” began in 1993, and that he responded in code words and gestures, asking her to come East. She said he asked her to be his wife during a televised “teaser” for his show by saying, “Marry me, Oprah.”
Clearly, something is rotten in the state of our judicial system when people who are obviously insane are granted restraining orders against total strangers by citing “mental harrassment” . Does this mean that I can finally get a restraining order against Conan O’Brian for mentally coercing me to have a 3-some with him and Triumph (you sexy puppet you)?
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smackmaster “I like my beer cold.. my tv loud.. and my homosexuals flaming” |
December 22nd, 2005 at 8:59 am
your psychic abilities are off. that’s wasn’t conan o’brien….that was me
December 22nd, 2005 at 11:38 am
does this mean i’m being “mentally harrassed” every time i see a commercial for mcdonald’s and their oh-so-tasty double quarter pounders? i swear, i do zone out at my desk around lunch time when i start thinkin about “two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese…….” arrrrgghhhh! oh no! they’re doing it again!
January 5th, 2006 at 12:28 am
[…] Fresh from a recently lifted restraining order filed by a mentally insane woman, David Letterman showed that he’s still got a spring in his step on Tuesday night’s show. Letterman started getting uppity with guest Bill O’Reilly while they were discussing the war in Iraq, claiming that ““60% Of What [he says] is Crap.” Not bad David, you’re only about 40% off the mark. Click to play the video. […]